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What do you call a man wearing a rug on his head?
Matt.
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More dad jokes you'll groan at
I have a clean conscious—
it's never been used.
What do you do to have a space party?
You planet.
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts.
How do trees get on the internet?
They log in.
What did the nut say to the other nut in a game of tag?
Imma cashew!
"Dad, did you get a haircut?"
"No, I got them all cut!!"