I used to have a job at a calendar factory, but I got fired because

I took a couple of days off.

More dad jokes you'll groan at

Why did the employee go work in stilts? He wanted a raise.What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business.Why did the gym close down? It just didn't work out.Why do only some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don't work out.I got fired from my job at the bank today. A customer asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.Why did the employee get fired from the keyboard factory? He wasn’t putting in enough shifts.