My wife said she’s divorcing me for being too un-American.

I saw it coming from a kilometer away.

More dad jokes you'll groan at

I love all my children the same. Except for the one that sleeps… I love that one more.I don't often tell dad jokes. But when I do, he laughs What do kids play when they have nothing else to do? Bored games.I put your grandma on speed dial the other day. I call it insta-gram.Why do dads take an extra pair of socks when they play golf? In case they get a hole in one.What's it like to have the best son in the world? You'll have to ask grandpa!